It would be nice to sit in a church service that’s quiet and free from distractions, right? For those unsure about handling children, we may feel like we can’t wait for the kids to head to their classes. A quick disclaimer here about this article. I am not addressing whether kids should stay in for the full service or go to Sunday school at some point. That’s a discussion for another day. I approach this topic from the view that children need to be part of the church and not completely excluded. I hope that by the end of your reading, you see why it is important to integrate children into the life of the church, not begrudgingly, but with appreciation.
One of my fascinations during my years of ministry training in children’s work was the inclusion of children in congregational prayers. Families were given a slot to pray. Every family member prayed. That is the mother, the father, and the children. The church services were always designed to be child-friendly. For example, we always had a song that kids were familiar with. During all-age services, prayers were simplified to help children understand how they could talk to God as well, among other things. I hope churches continue to embrace this attitude, which helps kids see sitting through a church service not as an adult activity. For us adults, I hope we instinctively expect that our children and teens are part of the church family and seek to support them in every way possible. Today, I will share reflections from a book titled “FAQs: Biblical Answers to Youth and Children’s Leaders’ Questions” by Good Book Company
The author of this specific chapter that I will be focusing on, titled Poles Apart’ begins by showing where the problem started. He gives a hypothetical example of a child named Billy who wonders why he has to go to church, a cold and uncomfortable building. He barely understands what the preacher says and just tries to survive the service. The author says some children and teens growing up in such an environment end up not wanting anything to do with the church. Over time, most churches in the UK introduced youth and children’s workers to reach these kids. However, this led to another extreme in some churches, where youth leaders began leading a youth group gathering that ran parallel to the main service. This ended up separating these young people from interacting with the older folk. This is what Chris Slater calls the Polarisation problem. He especially warns youth leaders against this trap.
Why Children Belong in the Gathered Church
Chris Slater says,
“Inevitably, our church life will be impoverished if a particular generation is absent. In a congregation of entirely young people, for example, where does the wisdom of the years come from? Where will the example of life that has persevered be found? How will the younger generation learn the lessons of history? Polarization impoverishes the church.”
He goes on to emphasize the importance of integration by teaching the nature and purpose of the church across all age ranges. “Children can receive the message that this church business is not for them if there is no attempt to acknowledge and include them in the main expressions of church life. Parents can be so concerned with keeping their offspring quiet that they provide them with toys and the like to distract them. While they may achieve that particular objective, it serves to reinforce the idea that the church meeting is an adult activity”
The author acknowledges that integration into the life of the church is not always easy. However, it would be great if, as a church, we made an effort to include children and teens in our services. What gifts or areas of interest has the Lord given these children? For some, it might be singing, others praying, others serving in our projection team while for others helping with hospitality. It is important that, as the kids serve in all these different capacities, they should do it alongside the adults.
As members of the church, I hope we can appreciate that children are a blessing, not a nuisance. Scripture shows the inclusion of children as the Lord ordered the Israelites to assemble before Him (Deuteronomy 31:11-13). Joshua 18:35 speaks about the women, the little ones, the sojourners, and all who lived among the Israelites gathering before the Lord. Discipling the next generation in the ways of the Lord is a clear command from scripture as seen in Psalms 78:1-8. I hope we can take this into consideration as we think about our Sunday gatherings.
Welcoming Children as Blessings, Not Nuisances
It is important that children are part of the church service. They need to see their parents and other adults raise their voices to sing, respond in prayer, and sit through the service. I am not yet a parent, but I am challenged every time I bring kids from my neighborhood to church. Sitting with them during the service, singing and praying with them is not always easy, especially when they misbehave. However, it has been a joy to see them value sitting through the service. I hope and pray these opportunities sow seeds that will bear lasting fruit.
Reflection By Grace Njuguna -Children Worker-(GracePoint Church Waiyaki Way)